EAT A DUMP

All I Know

Posted on Monday, September 29, 2008 at 4:04 AM - Link

Is that it is 4:04am and I have been organizing my pictures and cleaning up my hard drives since 6 fucking 30 pm yesterday. God I wish I would of known then what I know now about digital organization for my photos! Are you kidding me right now. I am getting delerious.

Just A Little Something

Posted on Sunday, September 28, 2008 at 4:21 PM - Link

So last night I went to the Pirates Premiere and there was one thing I just couldn't get over. That no matter how comfortable I am with my sexuality, no matter what the amount of booze or pills, no matter who my date is I will never be comfortable watching people hump on a big screen with 500 complete strangers. It was just weird, that's all there is to it. Point blank, end of conversation. I do gotta give it up to DP though, the movie looks fucking amazing. The dildo parody in the begining was too fucking funny. Mr. Ben English was fucking hilarious as well, I would of never though of him as a comedian. All in all I was pretty impressed. I would of loved to seen the raw footage of Bella & Jessie's scene though. I'm sure there is some really good shit in there. Proceeded to get drunk next door about 30 minutes into the movie because as I said earlier, it was creepy. My "whoremotional" friend rear ended a car. She has one of those cars that have the back up cam. Well, I saw it coming, obvously she didn't though & BANG! I'm sure a BIG sorry goes out to the person with the Lexus she hit. So as I sit here on a lazy Sunday afternoon and reflect on my weekend I gotta say it was a really fun one.

itsandy.com

Posted on Monday, September 22, 2008 at 2:59 PM - Link

Funny little rant from my friend "It's Andy" hopefully you can read the screen cap. OK so you cant read the damn thing I just posted it and it is way fucking small. So here is what he said:

Post title: DJ AM & Travis Barker

People are dying in a senseless war, global warming is causing enormous storms, genocide is being committed in darfor, and our economy is going down faster than a $2 Tijuana hooker and you guys are more concerned with DJ AM & Travis Barker...really??? Wtf is wrong with this picture??

Don't get me wrong, it sucks that they got injured and even worse that those other ppl died in that plane crash, but should that really be your priority??

here's a tip, turn off MTV and turn on CNN!

just my 2 cents

-itsAndy. com

PS

Posted on Friday, September 19, 2008 at 5:35 PM - Link

BIG thanks to my boy ITSANDY.COM check out his site bitches!!!

OK

Posted on Friday, September 19, 2008 at 5:28 PM - Link

So I didn't get any fricken responses to my Porno Dan Contest and I'm feeling a little let down. Either I run a really shitty contest or people really don't give a fuck about my friend. And that my friends makes me sad. Maybe it was the fact that the party was being held in North Hollywood that scared everyone off, was it too gangsta? Was the over abundance of strange vagina too much for everyone to handle? Was the fact that no one could ever get a handle on Dan to make hanging out with him any fun? I don' t know but I'm not running anymore contests for a while. Either way his party was fun, I shot a gallery for AVN which should be up later today and I'll throw the link up. Something funny about the party was the Perrier booth that they had. Turns out that they were having this promotion and they were calling it Sexier which I though was funny, they also had Kinkier & Flirtier. I ended up drinking Perrier & Cokes all night, no booze for me. So basically it sucked. My liver needs a break, go straight edge (lol) Have a fun weekend. Julia Ann's Bar-B-Q on Sunday, yeah!!!

One Last Thing

Posted on Wednesday, September 17, 2008 at 10:06 PM - Link

Before I go to bed this evening.I want to wish Mr Porno Dan a very Whore-ppy Birthday. Tomorrow, his birthday should be afucking blast. Anyone who wants to go should hit him up to get on the list or check out his blog for info (it's in the lnks list bitches)

Yeah, I Have A Pretty Romantic Video To Share

Posted on Wednesday, September 17, 2008 at 4:49 PM - Link

You can either CLICK HERE or just click on our Youtube account on the side.

While I Was

Posted on Wednesday, September 17, 2008 at 2:25 PM - Link

On the Douche Cruise we stopped in Ensenada Mexico and decided to take our drunk asses to Papa's & Beer. This would of been such a normal easy thing if 1. Cravens wife (almost ex) wouldn't of been on the cruise 2. We wouldn't of had thoughts of all of us ending up in a Mexican jail (she would totally do something like pay the federales to do something like that) 3. They wouldn't of had automatic weapon's on very large 4x4 vehicles that they could run us down with. Well, we made it in and out of Mexico unscathed (well everyone except Jack) and as we got back on the bus and headed back to the ship one thing entered my mind and that was the American Express commercials. Here is our version.

Ticket for Kandi Kruise $500-

Coffee Cake in Mexico $29

Ensenada Tourist T-Shirt $10

Craven making it back to the boat in one piece, PRICELESS!

So I Am Back From

Posted on Wednesday, September 17, 2008 at 1:01 PM - Link

My Cruise, the Kandy Kruise or as us who were on the cruise liked to call it the Douche Cruise. Ya wanna know the fucked up thing about it is that 2 days later and a ridiculous amount of water later I still feel like I am on that fucker. Fun times!

Update On Deena Daniels Bukakke Experience

Posted on Wednesday, September 17, 2008 at 12:59 PM - Link

Yesterday I get a call from Porno Dan saying that his little sweet cheaks Deena Daniels was trying to get ahold of me. Low & behold here is the message I received this am. well here is the version of what happened to me. as everyone already knows i absolutely love guys! and a bukkake with all guys didnt seem bad at all.....i have watched a few girl/girl bukkake's but they looked terrible because the girls were pretty much peeing on the one girl and laughing at her, it was so bad the girl that was the star started crying. anyway i had no idea that 57 guys would actually show up for this shoot! i had been having a bad week as it is because i have been a little homesick for my family and i was feeling quite lonely. the whole thing couldnt have gone any better. the makeup artist put on extra thick lashes so it shielded all the cum from my eyes :) and she did a fantastic makeup job! the photographer was amazing! she made sure she got all the great shots.....i looked amazing in almost every pic because she was very helpful in helping me pose. the scene was so surreal to me because it was like a dream i had once had a long time ago. in the scene i was sitting on a toilet that was placed in a random empty room.....it started out with me masterbating as if no one was around and then before i climaxed i close my eyes and opened them to find a room FULL of turned on guys. i got to masterbate a little longer while they were all watching. i looked around the room and tried to make eye contact with all of them. each guy was very unique and different from the rest but they all had a little smile on their face....a few guys i knew were there too ;). then i layed back and closed my eyes as every guy came on me...it was very weird but in a weird way i liked it (except that there were a couple guys who need more sugar in their diet) i really wish i could have worn goggles so i knew which guy was cumming on me each time. lol and it would have been hilarious because my goggles are pretty bad ass ha ha i really want to thank jim for giving me that experience, never in my life did i ever think i would be able to get that many guys to come on me so quickly! i dont think i have ever felt more precious in my life! i really felt like the hottest thing in the room! and every guy was soooo nice and soooooo respectful! jim is also the best director in my opinion he made it so easy for me.....and he is so naturally talented with the camera as well as organized in the way he shoots his content. jim is definatly a great person and he has such a positive energy about him that just makes a room glow. i could go on forever about what a cool guy he is....and i have never met his wife but i am sure she is an amazing girl! after the shoot was over a few people helped me out with papertowels so i didnt get it everywhere, dan was there to help me with whatever i needed including a papertowel to shield my pussy from all the cum.....because after the fun was all over ha ha it did gross me out a little :). he guided me to the shower and got all of my shower supplies for me from my porn bag. and to clear things up.....dan is not my boyfriend....he is just a really great friend. i hate having boyfriends because i hate being owned and relationships are based on white lies anyway....ive tried to explain this to porno dan and his friends lol but whatever, i dont mind if they call me his girlfriend its just annoying when they announce it because then i feel like a horrible girlfriend because i couldnt help but flirt with all the guys. im pretty sure i wont have a relationship until i am at least 25, i spent 16-20 years old being in love and 2 of those years i was married and i was faithful till the last month of the 4th year which is very very hard for me to do. he he. so right now im just having fun and experiencing life because before porn i had never even been to a club...i never even drank until i was 20. im very blessed to be in porn and get paid to get laid! it also has changed my life in ssoooooo many ways. i am so secure with myself and so much more aware of my body, i also have learned that i can find just about 1 thing in every guy that turns me on :) as long as they arent a jerk. and i have overcome so many fears! and re-enacted so many of my dreams and fantasies......ITS FUCKIN AMAZING!. ------------oh ya and one more thing, cum is amazingly great for your hair. i have never had hair this soft before :)

I'm Outta Here

Posted on Friday, September 12, 2008 at 2:17 AM - Link

Time for me to get outta dodge for a minute. Ya know, hit the road. Now just a little note to my girls, don't get your whoremotions all tied up in a bundle. Sit down, take a break, you've been a busy little bee. Take a jacuzzi, eat a veggie burger, take time for the special people, watch your favorite teevo'd episode of that gay dance show you all watch (lol) reminisce on the past week, think long and hard and before you know it I'll be back. Poof!!! That was a joke, but seriously, in real life I'm outta here. Wish I had a guest blogger.

Another Contest: A Romantic Picture Of Porno Dan & His Girlfriend

Posted on Friday, September 12, 2008 at 1:42 AM - Link

True love or pure stupidity? This is my pal Dan (on the right, that's Jim Powers on the Left) And all those lucky guys in the background are the bukakke boys

This is Deena Daniels, the girl that Dan is dating and the lucky recipient of all the bukakke boys loads

This is my friend Dan escorting his freshly loaded girl up to the showers at Van Nuys Studio (where I'm sure he fucked her because he is a sick fuck)

Now to me this is where things get interesting. Looking at the last picture, Deena looks so excited (now I'm not sure if this is a turn on or off) Her look of utter enjoyment of having all of that random jizz all over her face. Also the fact that she is playing with herself. Or, is she rubbing cum into her vagina hoping to get pregnant? Say it's Dan's then collect from from Dan and have the 1st official bukakke baby? I have no idea which it is but there is the one thing I would like to know, the million dollar question. What in the hell is Dan thinking right now? God I should be at XXXJays house right now getting really fucked up earlier than I will be later? I can't beleive I am taking notes at a Bukakke? Or is he still pissed because he got kicked out of the Cabanna Room for the VMA aferparty? I have no idea but, enter the damn contest and win something. Winner will be announced sometime next week.

*Please send all entries to eatadump@gmail.com, the lucky winner of the contest will get the chance to meet Porno Dan and actually ask him what he was thinking and also receive 1 free coctail at his birthday party & maybe get some ass on their own at a porn party.

DISCLAIMER: Eatadump.com does not guarantee the state of Porno Dan at his birthday party. Eatadump.com does not guarantee that Dan will be coherent enough to answer any questions asked by said winner. Eatadump.com does not guarantee a good time at Dans party or condone the practice of unsafe safe sex at Dans party. Especially after Dan might of had sex with said talent, Eatadump.com does recognize that Dan has no heart, and the void in his chest that used to be his heart is his inner 3rd testicle. This my friends is why Porno Dan is able to have sex a bizillion times in a day and just like Nick Manning drop numerous loads on unsuspecting whores daily. That said, good luck.

Updates... .. .

Posted on Friday, September 5, 2008 at 10:52 AM - Link

I fucking hate it when I do that. i just wrote a whole fucking update and my damn computer froze! Piece of shit. Anyhow, I forgot some very, muey im por tant te catagories for Mr. P-Dizzle's Award Show. I really have to thank my friends over at GFY (Especially BV) for keeping it real. I can't beleive I forgot these.

You forgot:
meatiest vagina
most buttspokes
and most pimples on their ass.

This from Schmeggy aka SWMegan aka Satan aka Whoremotional:
Most Likely to OD at the Circle Bar
Biggest Primadonna aka "Get your own fucking water!" award

aka the Shameless I'm not getting fucking pink eye in both of my eyes again so get your own wet wipes award.

Another Thing About P-Dizzle

Posted on Thursday, September 4, 2008 at 11:18 PM - Link

One of the funniest things is that we came up with the list while we were driving then kinda finished it at Koo Koo Roo, one of my favorite places to catch a quick healthy lunch. Well looking at the utter disgust on Dan's face as he was forced to eat something that actually might nourish his body was priceless, he was actually pissed at me.

Driving Around

Posted on Thursday, September 4, 2008 at 9:59 PM - Link

Earlier today with Porno Dan we came up with a pretty ridiculous list of shit. I actually have to fill you in on the back story. So Dan and myself are now working with a company called iporn.com and to say the least we are having an interesting time. Well, Dan is throwing this party coming up in conjunction with iporn.com & the BBC is covering it for some documentary. As it also turns out Dan is hosting an awards show in conjunction with the event for I forget what company. Anyways, we were coming up with ideas earlier today for what the catagories should be. Here are just a few.

ugliest penis in porn
worst tit job in the biz
weakest load
most wood problems
best tube site
most annoying accent (male & female)
guys who would never get laid off camera if they weren't performers
Dr. Riggs all star patient of the year (male & female)
creepiest director
polish privateer of the year
porncrastinator of the year
worst production manager of the year
most likely to make it as a mainstream actress
suitcase pimp of the year
best dimples (not on your face)
most nose bleeds on set
Heisman award (aka runner of the year)
the Wanderlei Silva roid rage of the year award
shakiest cameraman
most likely to deny that they are in this business
unsung hero

*did I miss anything?

Craven's Guid To Dating In LA

Posted on Tuesday, September 2, 2008 at 4:20 PM - Link

I've been getting many emails about howIi bang so many girls? Why do all the girls like you? What can I do to pick up more girls in the la/ oc area? So many emails that I decided to share with my friends the secret and trick to dating the the beautiful species we call Women.

so here is my guide.....

first and foremost you must have money..... girls like flashy shit...

then you gotta have a nice ride. no bitch is gonna come pick you up , and she sure is fuck isn't gonna ride on the bus with you, regardless of how many ride free on your bus pass............ here are 2 examples...... first is a supra the second. an nsx...... i opt for the second since i own one, but its your choice ultimately

remember when you start your date girls want you to listen to them...... i know we dont give a shit what they are saying but you got to pretend.... just like they are when they told you they were cumming........

next get them drunk, like the rap song says " the goose get the girls loose" some shit like that .... they like pills too .....

after bout 10 drinks and 300 dollars later you should be up and running like my boy ken here..... tapen that ass

BUT at times all that still does not guarantee you ass. thats why ive come up with plan B and C......... plan b is a lil more subtle and works almost everytime

in the event plan C is called into action make sure you call for a maid for the following day. shit could get messy

and remember always be a gentlemen and drive the girls home, dont make them walk.... thats mean

BUT BEWARE THERE IS A DOWNSIDE TO ALL THIS ....... stay tuned for the next bulletin i will explain the downside of this method

Even Better

Posted on Wednesday, August 27, 2008 at 6:03 PM - Link

The truth comes out!

This Fag On The Right

Posted on Wednesday, August 27, 2008 at 5:55 PM - Link

Is a snake in the grass & loves trannies. Stay away from this dude.

Update From Store Erotica

Posted on Wednesday, August 27, 2008 at 5:52 PM - Link

Not Enough Skeep

Posted on Wednesday, August 27, 2008 at 11:12 AM - Link

I have not been getting enough sleep the past couple of nights. I have been working way overtime editing, trying to get all my funny clips edited from the past 3 months. I have a channel in the works that is gonna have you on the floor dying. Everything is along the same lines as "The Motorhome Hump" I'm gonna update the the eatadump channel tonight.

I Don't Know Why

Posted on Monday, August 25, 2008 at 10:11 AM - Link

Safari is so gay for me to update this thing. None of my tools show up in the tool bar. Check out our blogspot for a funny ass video clip of Alan Stafford in The Motorhome Hump

My Favorite Thing On The Planet (Well Almost)

Posted on Sunday, August 24, 2008 at 4:19 PM - Link

So I pretty much got one of the best gifts ever for my birthday, a Flip Video Mino. It's a little video camera that has a 2 gig internal hard drive (Anytime I say internal it totally makes me think of something else) Which give you 60 min of video. It connects directly to your computer via a little USB plug that flips out of the top and you can just drag and drom the videos directly to you computer. The quality of the video is actually really good. I have been shooting a ton of footage on the thing and have a couple of the edited (which will be on the youtube account very soon) and it is really fun. I am definatly no editor but it is so much easier getting a final product when you do not have to digitize the footage. I have put a couple of funny things together with just using imovie. I'll throw up the link as soon as I have them uploaded. Anyhow, check out the darn thing. It's about the size (actually smaller) than a pack of cigarettes, smaller than an ipod. The best thing is that people think you are taking photos of them. WRONG, it's video bitch! Video Surprise! Where's that footage going? That's the surprise. Here's the video that started it all. Pickle Surprise!

Just A Rant From Set

Posted on Sunday, August 24, 2008 at 4:16 PM - Link

PS I am not a fucking PA! Get your water yourself.

Shooting Today With Porno Dan

Posted on Sunday, August 24, 2008 at 12:15 PM - Link

And we are having a blast! We are actually kicking ass time wise. We have our first official update for our new site PolishPrivates.com Funny shit.

So I Haven't Posted In

Posted on Sunday, August 24, 2008 at 12:05 PM - Link

A bit. I have kind of been in a fowl mood lately. I had one of the worst shoots ever last week. To say the least, it really sucked ass! Sometimes no matter what you try and do people just suck! Ya just gotta chalk it up to them not being happy with who they are. I think that it is almost payment enough, just knowing that their life sucks that much. Payment in full. Anyway, it took a couple serious nights of drinking to forget what the little porker said. I'm not sure if she even appologized it would make a difference. Whores, Whores, Whores, whores on your no list!

PS I Bought A Bunch Of Funny URL's Today

Posted on Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 1:53 PM - Link

Here is the list and the descriptions of what the sites might be: polishprivates.com - a pov site for guys that want privates but hate the prices (lol) ivegotabeautifulcock.com - that one's so you can just run around and show people your cock wannacit.com - kinda the same thing povexpress.com - in the same affiliate program as polishprivates.com but you get more than 1 in a day it's for the people who want more bang for their buck or take cialus or Rhino51 (Porno Dan) *yeah I was pretty bored today (lol)

IR Directing Name Contest Continues

Posted on Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 1:50 PM - Link

Please e-mail your names to eatadump@gmail.com, the winner will get a bunch of free porn & some other shit. So far the winning name is Silky Jonson going to Dave Chapelle.

On Set For Silvercash (a little old, like a month ago)

Posted on Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 1:48 PM - Link

And we shot a bunch of super cute girls, one being Angelina Valentine with LA Direct and boy is she hot. She has this look on her face that is just amazing when she get's it. It's scary how much she reminded me of my ex when she fucks, the intensity is fucking over the top. I couldn't help but keep having flashbacks. She has these little cute freckles though, when she has no make up on, simple amazing. Not a huge fan of tatoo's but hers don't bother me, they actually add to the psychoness that kind of attracts me to her (lol) Damn, OK breath, stop obsessing. Needless to say it was a nice day. Had Mr. Tony Flush (myspace.com/tonyflush) on set as the man running shit so you know it was a good day.

1st Shoot For Vivid

Posted on Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 1:47 PM - Link

With Ms Penny Mutha Fuckin Flame President Of Earth. She's like my Polish agent I swear to god. This girl has got me so much work & I fucking love her. Not just because she gets me work but because she is just about the coolest human being that I have ever met, and one of the smartest little whipper snappers I've met too. Plus she has amazing boobs but Eeeewww, it's like talking about my little sister. GROSS!!! I wish I could recriprocate, I hope she reads my blog. Penny Flame I Fucking Love You. PS I fucking Killed It too. PSS I kinda have a new crush too, her name is Aiden Starr. Don't know how in the hell this one has flied under my radar for so long but the girl is nasty as hell with the dirty talk and has a fucking amazing body. Even better is her fucking attitude. Yeah, she kinda turns me on. Actually I'm listening to her dom some fucking dude in the next room and I kinda am getting a chub rock. God I love chicks that can talk shit. Here's a link to her in all of her awesomeness. I've seen her pictures before but they just don't do the girl justice, well actually they are pretty hot but you gotta see her (actually hear her) Anyhow, enough ranting.

Hhhmm... .. .

Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 at 12:02 AM - Link

imsofuckinghorny.com

A 3 Hour Tour

Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 at 12:00 AM - Link

Oh, here's a good one. So we ended up renting a boat for the last day when I was shooting for Silvercash. We took it out to this island in the harbor which was pretty cool. We ended up shooting 3 scenes out there. Well halfway through the day we had to push the boat out because the tide was going out and the boat was getting beached. We all pushed this thing down into the water, a 50' racing pontoon boat. I told the captain that I thought we should maybe push it out a little farther so we wouldn't get stuck, he thought we were fine though. Who am I to second guess the boat captain? I'm the fucking man, that's who I am and that's the last time I don't fucking say something. Cut to 8pm and we just wrapped the last scene. Were all watching a beautiful sunset and everyone boards the boat. He raises the land anchor and were sitting there as he plows away on the double psycho diesel engines and nothing. We get out and push the thing and nothing, the fucking thing is beached. He has to call AAA for boats. We end up chilling and watching one of the best lightning storms off in the distance that I have ever seen. It was so fucking cool! Anyhow, we get our shit towed and survive our Gilligan's Island experience and make it back in enought ime for the open bar for the GFY party. Thank god!

Fliz-Az-Or-Diz-Zah

Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 at 11:57 PM - Link

Florida, Florida, Florida, well here is one of the funny stories from our Shane's World trip. So were shooting the movie Girls Night Out 2 and we have this little girl named Tanner Mayes on set. A cute little girl from the sunny state of Florida. I had shot her earlier in the week for Silvercash and the one thing I didn't get with her was the attitude. Here is a girl that is cute as a button and could really go far, shit she probably will but her attitude was fucking killing me. I really didn't get it,. I couldn't figure out if it was one of those things where girls are a pain in the ass because she kinda liked me or wether she was just that, a pain in the ass. Either was it was kinda annoying. Cut later to that evening and we have already shot the intro, taken the party bus to the club and gotten these girls pretty fucking liquored up. (shit I was already pretty fucking liquored up before I even got to the shoot, that was thanks to Albert at Silvercash who just wouldn't take no as an answer for drinks at our wrap dinner) Anyhow, were shooting at the club and she just gets anniliated! I mean out of control drunk! She actually swung on one of the girls we were shooting with, Michelle Peters who is a fucking doll. Really didn't get that at all. Personally I thought it would of been a really fun fight to watch though. I think Michelle would of taken her though. She's kinda ghetto fabulous, I love it. Then we get into the party bus and are headed back to the hotel. Trying to wrap up the shooting and get an out for the evening. We finally get the out and then it happens, Tanner falls in love (lol) Well maybe it had something to do with t he amount of alcohol she had but fuck it, let me get my 15 minutes of fame. Hahahaha. The girls was fucking all over me. Awkard! The girl wouldn't take no as an answer. It was like being back in Hawaii with Penny Flame all over again with Taryn Tomas. The fact that I said no made her want it even more.

Cut to 1 day earlier, Charles Dera did not have a badge to get into the show so I grabbed him one of mine down at reservations. So I gave him my badge and I went down a grabbed another. Problem solved. Cut to that evening back in the party bus. I am doing whatever I can to pawn off Tanner on anyone because that type of shit just doesn't happen while we are still fucking on the bus. After in privacy is fine but on the fucking bus, no. So I pass her off to Charles, I was like "dude, fucking save me." I get up and he just walks right in with his dick hard an puts it right in her mouth. She starts blowing away and I take a seat. Pheeeww. Gah, gah, gah. Tanner seems to be stoked until like 5 minutes in where she looks up at Charles and says " Your not Shameless" and spits his cock out and then starts stumbling towards me again. Dude, I was on the fucking floor. Smokey was rolling on the whole thing because it was too fucking funny. I can't wait to see the footage. That shit was funny as hell. When we got to the hotel we all split our seperate ways and as I walk towards my elevator to head up to the room I see Tanner being escorted into the elevator by 2 black security guards. I think she might of done her first IR DP that evening (lol) God I love Florida.

Dinner With The Silvercash Crew

Posted on Monday, August 11, 2008 at 12:11 AM - Link

Needless to say that by the time I got to the Westin I was ready for a nice dinner. I had been in Miami shooting with Parker from Silvercash and I think we were al ready to unwind a llittle. The whole Silvercash crew me at this asian place called????? Azia I think? Anyhow, the place was sooooo good. It was probably one of the best meals I have had in the past year. I wanna thank Albert who did the place justice totally over ordering just as i do. They had these mango mojitos with saki that were amazing. Needless to say we were all hammered after that dinner. Great time, thanks. Staring at the Silvercash Bikini Finalists wasn't bad either (lol)

Simply Amazing (More From Florida)

Posted on Monday, August 11, 2008 at 12:06 AM - Link

Does anyone out there have a photo of Charles Dera in the outfit he was wearing running the around the pool? That shit was fucking classic. You know when Denis Rodman is scared to get close to you your making an impression (lol)

Need a pic, please send

BIG UP

Posted on Sunday, August 10, 2008 at 4:30 AM - Link

To Anthony from BOS Bucks for the UFC party last night, it was awesome, the end.

Audrey Flakeonni

Posted on Sunday, August 10, 2008 at 4:18 AM - Link

Well, well, well. Sitting my ass at the airport and all I can think of is damn, I can't wait to get home! This has been a long ass trip and boy is my back outta wack. Besides that though I had a really fun time. There are a couple of things that I do feel like I have to address though, being that whores are dumb no matter where you are but Florida whores take the cake. Things that no matter where you are stand true reguarding whores:

1. They are always late
2. They lie like a mutha fucka
3. They seem to really like UFC parties
4. They always get cought in the stupidest lies

I'm sure there's a lot more but these are the things that are coming to me right off the bat. Now I know that I have ranted before about whores and blah blah blah but this time it is not personal it's just a fact. I was a hired gun for Shane's World on this trip to Florida. They were shooting a movie called girls night out. Now the basis of this thing is a party. One that takes place in one night. Well we actually shoot it in two, one night for the party and a little bit of the sex and the second for the rest of the sex. So the girls have to be there for both nights. Well this is where my ranting comes in, I'm not gonna name manes but her name rhymes with my title of this post and her desire to lie about what she was doing (hhmmm) at my boys party (Anthony from Bos Bucks) and preceded to watch the UFC fight instead of get plowed on camera fucking boggles my mind. Don't commit if you can't fucking do it. Anyhow, it wasted all of our time and alot of money.

Getting Ready To Get Out Of Town

Posted on Thursday, July 31, 2008 at 9:07 PM - Link

For a trip to Miami for like 10 days. Excited to get out of town for a little bit. It'll be fun, haven't been to Miami in a couple of years, well actually I just drove through it about 3 months ago for Shane's World but I haven't been to Miami Propper in a bit. The last time I was there was with the ex-wifey like 3 years ago. I'm heading out there with Silver Cash andshooting for a couple of other peeps while I'm there as well. Shooting a girls night out for Shane's World and something for Brazzers as well. This is gonna be a fun ass trip. Then I get back and shoot for Penny Flame on her gig for Vivid which is really cool. This is my frist time working for Vivid and I'm kinda excited about it.

Today was an interesting day though to say the least. I had a bunch of really good meetings and thena bunch of really random things happen too. The fags at Sunrise Ford where I bought my truck never dealt with taking care of the rental car that they got me because they were taking so long getting my truck finished. To top it off my salesman had a fucking attitude withmy Mom who called them to deal withit for me. Fucking amazing! So now not only did he pissher off but he pissed me off and then I had to call him and end up dealing with it. Fricken Jerk. My neighbor ended up being really jerkyto my Mom today too! Maybe today just wasn't her day. But I'm gonna have toi have a talk with him too now, why can't people just be nice? Get's you so much farther. Anyhow, he pissed me off. What else, I ran out to Malibu this afternoon to surf because the surf has been going off bythe way. I was running into my boys house and I stubbed my pinky toe and pretty much took a huge chunk out of it, OUCH! What else? Had breakfast with Derrick Pierce and talked about our trip were taking on the Kandi Cruise which is gonna be awesome. Also had a meeting at Shane's World with Paul aka VooDoo reguarding the design of my site which I am really excited about. Fucking awesome, we came up with alot of really good shit for the layout and design and all the options. Besides that today was totally fucking normal (lol)

I had this guy get ahold of me today who runs a blog called I HATE WHORES and traded links with him. His site is pretty fucking funny too,check it out. Surfing in the morning in Malibu, that's it bitches!

Last Night Was A Blast

Posted on Sunday, July 27, 2008 at 8:56 PM - Link

After an awesome day at the beach (the surf was going off) I headed back to the Valley to a meeting @ Cheesecake Factory (which turned out really good) I had the Wasabi Crusted Ahi Tuna which was a tasty piece of fish! Then I headed over to this party off of Amestoy that Porno Dan was at. That was fun to see him. They tried to charge us $20 at the door though which was a fucking joke! I was there for about 30 min then I headed back t o my house to drop off my surfboards & get ready. I headed over to this place called Happy Endings which is off of Sunset Blvd and lemme tell you something, that place is really fun. Just a normal kind of bar that has a bunch of flat screens and a bunch of chill peeps. I hung there for a bit with the SW Peep's and then rolled over to meet my friends at this club called something 3. I t was my friend Rocco's birthday. There were a bunch of my friends there and it was cool to catch up with em. Shit, I hadn't seen Rocco in a bit, ran into Derrick Pierce, Jonny Sins, Blake from Brazzers whoe else, Lexi Belle (who looked cute as a button) Alan Staffford who I had just shot the day before for Shane's World, a bunch of other cuties too, Jordan Jaymes (I think that's her name) Brigette, some other blonds girl, yeah, it was pretty fun. Then headed home for my whole 4 hours of sleep before I had to be up this am at 6 for IPORN. Here I am 14 hours later kicking myself in the ass! I'm really excited for Florida though. I'm heading out there for Silver Sinema and shooting for Shane's World as well, I got Brazzers for a click during the day and then maybe some stuff for IPORN as well. Shit, my month is turning out pretty smoking so far! Knock on wood. Speaking of wood, im so fucking horny right now! (that's a joke and if you know me and my friends then you will get that) I also own the URL as well, imsofuckinghorny.com bitches!!!! See ya tomorrow, whore-chata!

Yes I'm Still Shooting That Scene

Posted on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 at 2:49 PM - Link

Well today we are going to try and finish the scene we never got to start yesterday for Shane's World. We'll see how it goes. We shot the intro & stills yesterday but no scene, one of the girls test was still pending. Shooting tomorrow in Malibu as well so ya might not hear from me for a day or so, I know, you're so disappointed.

UUuumm

Posted on Tuesday, July 22, 2008 at 11:53 PM - Link

Turns out that me & Craven have banged the whole page. Not sure if this shows off her make-up or our accomplishments or if they are accomplishments (lol) All I know is that Craven and myself were dying when we got to this page. Turns out to be this make-up artist Taryn page, not sure why she sent me a friend request? I don't even think that she likes me. Myspace Rules

MOM?

Posted on Tuesday, July 22, 2008 at 6:19 PM - Link

So I bought a new truck a couple of days ago and am tricking it all out and stuff. I got my stereo & navigation in, toneau cover and now I just ordered my rims and tires and carpet kit for the back. The carpet kit is through this company called Bed Rugs. They sell a really cool carpet kit that is removable, it just velcro's into the bed. So I was on their site earlier today (about 10 min ago) checking out their pictures of what they look like and came across this. It is fucking classic and just though I would share it with you. Have a great day!

Tom Byron Is Funny

Posted on Tuesday, July 22, 2008 at 6:01 PM - Link

Check out this funny ass video on POPPORN.COM

Dating A Porn Star

Posted on Tuesday, July 22, 2008 at 5:22 PM - Link

This excerpt was taken from my friend Joe Joe's myspace. Turns out Craven & Joe were surfing the internet earlier today and found it. Just thought is was pretty funny, so here it is and also links to their myspace's. If your not friends with then yet get on it!

Craven's Myspace

Joe Joe's Myspace

Here's the Bulletin:

After reading a bulletin posted by a thespian of debauchary, I looked into the question if it's possible to date a porn star.
Here is the bulletin:

Ok so since my start in the adult industry I havent had the opportunity to tell my entire family..Well I have been at my moms house taking care of her for the past 2 days...One of my younger sisters (23) came by to visit...We used to be really close but not anymore. I hardley ever talk to her now a days..Well I made a promise to myself that I would never lie about my job..So she asked me how life was and my job...So I told her about my new adventures in porn..Lets just say she was NOT happy about it..We got into a big fight and she called me a prostitute!! She told me how im stupid and theres no life in porn.. Also that I must have self esteem issues...She just kept going trying to belittle me...I tried to explain how things were and how I enjoy my job...She didnt care..So I think my hardley there relationship with her just fizzled into nothing...Isnt life about being happy and succeeding??? I have both why cant people just be happy!! UGh what a day! So Im making myself feel better and baking brownies with the 4 year old!! HEHE...Hope you all are having a better day then Iam!! XOXO

and here is a follow up bulletin by the same adult film cock gluttonist:

Thank you all for replying..First it is very possible for me to be single...The only kind of relationships I have are the ones at work for 15 minutes!!! LOL.. I guess I miss the male campanionship that Im used to having...Taking care of someone, sleeping next to someone....The little stuff...My job doesnt help I suppose..I need to find someone who is very opened minded....Does anyone have any comments about dating someone in the industry..Do you think you could really handle it? Do you think you could really fall in love with someone that does this kind of work? Thanks! XOXO

So, if you're a "civilian", as the adult film stars like to call us non porn, non emotionally damaged, non childhood traumatized people, here is HOW to date a porn star if you so choose to embark on unnecessary drama and headaches. Here is how to get on the roller coaster of insanity and mental lapse and ignore all good judgement:

After spending the weekend at a bachelor party being asked 'How do I get to date a porn star' and then returning to an inbox filled with variations on the same question I thought I'd better provide an answer.

I speak from experience. I've dated several porn stars- Glamour models, Playmates and Porn Stars. I don't recommend it.

Dating a Playmate's like driving a Ferrari Enzo. You're constantly stared at, as soon as you stop moving you're surrounded by a crowd of onlookers and people keep asking how '…a guy like you got that.'

Glamour model's are a little easier. As they don't have sex for money they're easier to be around and less shocking to introduce to friends and family. Less positively, they often possess bodies capable of making anything they wear slightly pornographic, which gets embarrassing at funerals.

Porn stars are the most difficult. They get approached by men who've seen them having sex and assume that standards of normal courtesy don't apply. They're often crazy. When you introduce a porn star to your father, and he takes you aside and says 'She looks so familiar…', you can essentially say goodbye to your erection for a week as your head fills with pictures of poppa enjoying your lady's work.

All that aside, meeting your victim potential partner is the first step.

If you live in LA, and you go out, you're meeting people from the adult industry all the time, even if you're unaware of it. Give it time and you can approach an adult performer in an entirely natural way in a bar, club or library. It's the best way but also the least certain.

If I wasn't in the industry I'd say the easiest place to meet people, with a view to seeing them on your own time, is at a party. There are lots of BBQ's, pool parties and events which have an almost 100% jizz bizz guestlist. Making friends with someone who works behind the scenes is a good way to get invited, the industry's small and being a friend of a friend can win you a guest pass.

Be careful who you choose to hang with, you could easily buddy up to someone controversial and end up being blackballed from one industry clique or another. (If someone asks you to a party and mentions being blackballed, make sure you're not being hit on by Lexington Steele.)

If making friends seems too hard you may be a sociopath. To meet others like you, and a wide range of adult performers, you can try visiting trade shows - notably InterNext in January and August and Erotica LA in July. This creates about as positive an impression as tackling a woman while she fumbles for her keys in an underground parking lot and dry humping her. Women have their guards up when they're surrounded by tubby Trekkies with hard-ons.

LA natives have a chance to hang with performers each week at 'Porn Star Karaoke' which takes place at 9 p.m. each Tuesday at Sardos, 259 North Pass Avenue in Burbank, just off the 134 freeway. There's always a good selection of people, and it's open to the public. Take a cute and outgoing girl with you. A lot of women in the business are bisexual and they'll notice her before they notice you. It's an easy way to an introduction and will make you look less like a desperate fanboy loser customer.

Finally - if you're rich you can buy an evening with a porn star at Danni. com. Their auction site regularly lists chaperoned 'Dream Dates' with models and performers. Be warned - they're not all single and some of them chew with their mouth open. Dates often go for over $3,000 and some have made over $7,000 - there are some very rich and determined fans out there.

For the purpose of full disclosure I launched Danni. com's auction site, but I don't make a dime from it. It's legitimate and the dates are well organized and fun (I've chaperoned a few myself but don't worry - normally it's a cute woman, not a 200 lb guy).

Most of the time making a good impression on someone who works in the sex industry is about being unlike all the other men they meet. These women are hit on all day, every day. They're very aware of their status as sex objects and are inherently distrustful of men. Don't talk about any prison time or your collection of hunting knives until you've formed some sort of bond.

Once you've met your your target here's what to do when you're talking, charming and dating her:

1. Be cool

Play hard to get, even if it means tea-bagging your junk in an icy drink (not hers) when she leaves to go to the restroom. She wants to date an equal not a fan. Be as nonchalant as you can without being a dick.

Whatever you do don't show her off. She know's she's a prize. Don't use her to impress your crew and don't mention what she does in public unless she does. Introducing her as "Mary, from Massive Objects Mary dotcom," will end your evening fast.

2. Be a gentleman

She works in places where people glance at her drivers license and then ask her to strip off (like the DMV). She will be particularly vulnerable to old-school charm. Flowers, cards and notes go a long way, as long as they're meant sincerely. She will want to know that you like her despite of, not because of, what she does.

If she tells you her real name she trusts you. Don't use it in public unless she does. Performers have to guard their identity's and switch between persona's for good reason. She knows the waiter recognized her when she walked in, and will show up at her house if he can use her real name to find out where she lives. Kill him now, she'll thank you later.

Take your romantic inspiration from Lionel Richie's 'Three Times a Lady', not The Analog Brothers 'Pimp to Eat'.

3. Make her chase you

There's nothing a woman finds more attractive than a guy they can't get. Let her make all the moves. She will, and you'll look cooler than all the guys chasing her.

Whenever I've had performers flirting with me I've been in situations where responding in kind would be seen as unprofessional. It could be my aftershave that makes them want me, I wear Sex Panther which is illegal in nine countries, but it was probably because I was hard to get.

4. Don't become a suitcase pimp

Show no interest in getting into the adult industry yourself or managing her career. A lot of guys see performers as a meal ticket and if you give off that vibe she'll run away. Even offering to help drive her to a photo-shoot, or spend all her money on your car, can set off alarm bells.

To avoid looking like a suitcase pimp avoid sunglasses unless you're outside and it's sunny, wearing untucked, open-necked shirts made of shiny fabric, or being in a band that doesn't sell enough records to keep you fully occupied.

5. Clean your whip

If you don't have nice wheels at least keep them clean. There's a lot of money in porn, you're going to have to park beside a lot of nice steel. In LA people check out your steed if they can't be bothered to talk to you but want to work out what kind of person you are. LA's fucked.

I can't really explain this, but every woman I've ever met in the adult business has liked cars. I used to drive a European classic which attracted women like a free shoes, lose weight, fuck Brad Pitt promotion at the local mall. Respect your ride.

6. Hide your stash (and your cash)

De-porn your apartment. Porn is work for her. If she's into it she'll lead the way and provide it for free. Assume she's not and eliminate the risk of getting it wrong. Once again the less of a fan you appear the better.

She'll see fantasizing over people she knows as akin to cheating. Pointing out that she's had sex with the people on the DVD's she's bitching about, while I'm totally monogamous won't win the argument. Nor will pointing out that claiming to be a Catholic is a bit strong Lena, given how you make your fucking money? Christ you're a hypocrite.

7. Don't assume

Forget what she does when you're talking to her - even if it's playing on a plasma screen just over her right shoulder. If you treat her like a stereotype you'll mark yourself out as an asshole and provide evidence that you're not listening to what she's saying.

Let her talk and then latch onto the things she says. Don't worry if you get it wrong to start with, listening is hard (tip - watch Oprah, they do it on there.) Practice on less attractive women and build up to one your really want to be, you know, on.

8. Be smart

This is psychology. People assume she's stupid because she's sexual. She hates that, and goes out of her way to appear smart. Therefore if you appear smart, you become the kind of man she thinks she should be with, even if you're not ideal in other regards. Even if she's not smart, she'll be flattered that someone who appears to be is interested in what she's thinking.

Take a breath. You might be feeling dizzy. That's okay - I am blowing your mind.

9. Be mainstream

Porn stars often take the 'No one outside the industry understands this' view and resolve to date only performers after a string of failed relationships. With these people you've got no chance. Luckily the majority of people don't feel this way and want to date people who are as mainstream as possible.

The most attractive partners for women in the industry are men who are more famous than they are, and guys with good, respectable jobs. Cops, doctors, teachers and other totally average occupations have a bizarre reverse glamour for people inside the jizz-bizz.

Whatever you say, don't say you're unemployed. It says suitcase pimp faster than a furry hat and a bass guitar riff.

10. Don't look

One of my best friends tells his partner "I promised to be faithful, not blind" whenever she catches him looking. She laughs. It won't work with a performer.

Women who are (brutally) judged on their looks, are very wary of men who might only want to be with them because of how they look. If you stare at every teenage Lycra-clad-Happy-Meal that walks by, you'll give off a vibe that you're looking for the next hot thing. She wants to know you're into her and her alone. Especially when she stops starving herself and living in the gym.

Here's a tip for creating that effect. Stare at her forehead and try to count the follicles on her hairline. The slowly scanning gaze this creates will look almost identical to falling in love from her perspective.

11. Be boring

If you've followed all the advice to this point you'll be going to bed with her soon. Keep it simple.

Once again, she's going to want to know you're in bed with her - not the fantasy she projects at work. Be loving, and keep it tame - lots of kissing. Leave the gas-mask and 'Mini Replica Vibrating Pope' in the closet for now.

The wild stuff might never happen. Some performers like to keep what they do in their private life and at work as different as possible. Be very careful about spicing it up, she'll lead the way when she's ready. If she comes home to find that you've got a Darth Vader mask on and have lubricated the faucets you will scare her off.

Go get em tiger.

So, now you know how to date a porn star.
Does that mean it's a good idea? Lets find out:

Single guys won't admit this, especially to women, but at one time or another they have wondered what it would be like to date an adult-film star.

We don't mean to be perverted (regardless of how it sounds).

Men only discuss this among themselves, usually over large quantities of beer and chicken wings (or here in Miami, Bacardi and ceviche).

Can a normal, regular guy date a porn queen?

I decided to take one for the team and get to the bottom of this question. The Exxxotica convention was recently held in Miami Beach, and what better venue to find out what the starlets think? (Insert your own joke here.)

So I asked the opinions of three well known stars. And the resounding answer was yes, a regular guy "does" have a chance.

"Absolutely," said Jennifer Drake, a diva from Wicked Pictures. "It's probably a lot easier than guys would think because aside from the fact that we have sex on camera, we're pretty normal. We have our hobbies, like yoga, swimming and reading."

Whoa! Why didn't I think of it that way?

Jennifer said dating someone outside of the industry is referred as dating a "civilian.
" (Does President Bush know the adult-entertainment industry is taking lingo notes from the military? Don't ask, don't tell!)

"I met a guy at Target once," Jennifer continued. "And I like people who share similar interests. The last time I got out of a relationship it was with a civilian. Essentially it was a problem with him dealing with what I do."

Ah, yes, there is that. Having sex. On film. As a career.

The starlets all said "that" is the single toughest part of dating a "civilian." (remember, civilian means NORMAL)

"A lot of us girls date regular guys but it's hard because you want to meet someone who understands your business and isn't jealous," said Tera Patrick, one of a handful of adult stars who has crossed over into mainstream culture.

While their films tend to attract "civilians," after a few months the novelty wears off.

"Jealousy can rear its ugly head," Jennifer said. "But like any other relationship, you need a lot of communication."

The more I spoke to these women, the more I heard words like communication, common interests, confidence and being yourself - staples of any relationship.

Carmen Luvana said she doesn't believe in mixing "business with pleasure." (But what if your business is pleasure? OK, never mind.) She met her "civilian" boyfriend of two years through a mutual friend.

"The big misconception by guys is they think because we have sex for a living they think that will happen all the time," Carmen said. "Just be yourself and don't talk about how many movies you have watched. Be normal and treat her like a normal person .... We want a guy that wants you for you and not because you are an adult star and he wants to let everyone know."

OK, so don't date the woman on the video jacket. Go after what's on the inside (of her - not the DVD!). Seems like common sense. But where would a guy meet a starlet? Not at an adult convention.

"That gets really old, really fast," Tera said. "At conventions they ask if you are single, if they can have your number, and say they want to marry you. It's OK to meet a fan or date a fan, but not a fanatic."

Aside from Target, other ways women say they've met men included at a tanning salon, at a spa or through friends.

"A lot of girls are looking for that guy who can take them away from everything," Tera said. "In the end, when the curls come out and the eyelashes come off, you want someone who will love you for you."

Go figure, huh?

follow ups to this article suggest that sleeping with a porn star is a much better alternative to dating a porn star.
The physical reward without the mental consequences:

Here's The Link

Let us save you some trouble.
THE CONCLUSION:

Could you seriously date a porn star past or present? And by "date" I mean "be seen in public with a well known debauchery thespian, on a regular basis". I've been known to be understanding in regard to questionable pasts, but I'm not so certain this is one "speedbump" I'd be willing or able to get past. I know we all have skeletons in our closets, but not everyone's skeletons have numerous video documentations of you at some point playing an enchanting solo on their skin flute. You see, when it comes to intimacy, I like many of you secretly want to feel that all the nasty and potentially incriminating things I am doing recurrently are making their exclusive debut with me.

Obviously that could NEVER be the case with a porn star. There is absolutely NOTHING they haven't seen and/or tried "ummm… was that a pineapple you just spat out of your poon?" Dating porn stars will have you at Wal-Mart at 3:24a buying artificial pinecones, a book of paper dolls, a Michael McDonald Greatest Hits album, and a brisket, and only heaven knows what she's gonna do with all that.

Needless to say, you could NEVER introduce her to your friends or family. What if they are fans of her work? "Hey Josh, have I introduced you to my new girl, Jez…" "Naah, man you haven't, but we've met" "What do you mean you've met?" "she's been solely responsible for millions upon millions of my snotty swimmers meeting their imminent deaths in their yellow Wendy's napkin graves since the 8th grade."

Then, what happens when you two are on a date and you run into one of her "co-stars" whom you only happen to know by his porn name? This is amplified when you've actually seen the "project they worked together on." "Oh my goodness…. is that… yeah that's him… HEEEYYYYY, Dickalicious Jenkins, what are you doing here? Have you met my boyfriend Jeremy?" he inevitably and cordially extends his hand, "Hey man, nice to meet you" I'd have to be rude, "uhh…. naah player.. you can put your hand down. I happen to know what you do with that hand, and I ain't had my shots yet. Nigga wouldn't want to break out with a nearly fatal case of the heeby-jeeby's now would he? Oh yeah by the way, I loved you in "The Great Masterbaters" with Denzel Cockington. and "Happy Skeet" is probably your best work to date….. I wasn't sure if you could pull off that role as a sex crazed penguin, but you did it!"

So take my word for it fellas, I don't care if she is finer than frog hair split four ways, leave the porn stars for other porn stars. What can you honestly bring to the table? She's used to penises so big they have an elbow. Gentlemen, remember, these girls swallow male ejaculate for a living and have the mental capacity of a 5 year old retard on Meth. You know where your girlfriends mouth has been? I'll tell you where, on some dudes wart infested, herpes covered penis. Mmmmmmmmmm. Bet you're pretty proud to introduce her to all your friends and family, aren't cha? Where's the fun in banging a girl who's paid to fuck douche bags on film? Where is the challenge in that? In sum and substance, dating a porn star is basically an extended, glorified booty call. It's an emotionless pit. Pornstars are incapable of loving you back due to having their childhood raped from them and have become void of emotions. Being a porn star is social suicide and dating one is emotional suicide. Save yourself the embarrassment, and just renew membership to your favorite porn sites.

So, is it possible to date a porn star? Yes.
Do you want to?

FUCK NO!

I'm Finally ReCooped

Posted on Monday, July 21, 2008 at 10:47 PM - Link

From the weekend's shindigs. Actually I was feeling kinda better last night. Went for a run with Derrick Pierce @ John Burroughs High School (weird to be running where I went to school) And by the way my calves are on fucking fire now. And then we ended up heading out to a movie after. We saw the new Batman, which name is totally escaping me right now. But I did think that it would make a great IR Directing name (since my official contest has not come to an end) Oh, it's called Dark Knight. It was great but really long, almost 3 hours. I almost had to pull the ripcord on the evening because I was so hungry, luckily Derrick was too, Cheescake! Anyhow, got home around 2 and hit the hay.

This afternoon was pretty fun though. It's always a fun day when you just shoot hot girls stripping down and playing with themselves. Nice change of pace from the normal porn shit. Today we had the best group of girls, this girl who I have wanted to shoot for a long time now, Sochee Mala (so hot!) and this other girl Angie Savage who was killing me. She is seriously one of the funnies girls I have met in a long time on set. Her voice totally reminded me of that girl Dottie from Pee Wee's Big Adventure. I mean she sounded exactly like her. She was the last girl of the day and definitely kept us in stitches, thank god because Dave was fucking pissing me off!

Tomorrow is Shane's World and I am very happy about that

Too Tired

Posted on Sunday, July 20, 2008 at 5:27 PM - Link

But last night rocked! Thanks to GR for hooking me up. Watched MSTRKRFT from the sound board & lemme tell you something. That definatly is the best seat in the house, hands down. Pics coming later, too tierd, I go back to sleep.

HARD LA

Posted on Saturday, July 19, 2008 at 5:41 PM - Link

buy tickets @ imsofuckinghorny.com, just kidding, buy em there.

My 1st Questionaire

Posted on Saturday, July 19, 2008 at 5:28 PM - Link

About my blog. I got an e-mail from a guy named Xarian (or at least that's the name of his blog) and he has a cool fitness blog. I think he found me linked to Christian's Blog and sent me some fun questions. It's been a while since I have really taken a look at my life and I kinda realized something, something really cool at that. My life doesn't suck. I have a pretty cool life, I'm not bragging or anything but it really doesn't suck. My friends are pretty awesome, I'm working alot, I have so much to be thankful for. I probably sound like a fucking bible wacker. There will be no bible wacking here though, just thought I give him a BIG thanks for including us in his world. Pretty cool. Anyhow, have an awesome weekend, I'm off to my boys event tonight, HARD LA @ the Shrine which should be sick. NERD is playing along with a bunch of great DJ's, Jason Bently, MSTR KRFT ect.

A Note From "Porno Dan"

Posted on Wednesday, July 16, 2008 at 12:42 AM - Link

The downward spiral of the artist formerly known as DJ Airek

It all started on Friday afternoon in the midst of, "The Man Party". This is the party where Cory had his ass kicked by Anthony and the President of Earth, Penny Flame, in a span of fifteen minutes. It was also the party where many great laughs were had by those that attended.

JC and Rick Shameless were both going to be celebrate their birthdays at Body English inside the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. In the midst of many great stories being told, someone got the brilliant idea that they should give Porno Dan the task of finding the artist formerly known as DJ Airek. Given his quest Porno Dan departed the Man Party and set off on his perilous journey to find Airek..

JC, XXX Jay, Big E and Huggie Mccuddles AKA Big Steve were eating dinner when who should walk into Nobu, but Porno Dan and Airek!!! Airek complained that he didn't food and wanted to party right away. Being the good pals they are XXX Jay and JC obliged his request and feed him Bolivian Army Marching Power so he would his long night. Airek then started pounding vodka and Red Bull's like a mad man, Airek was possessed to have a good time. Porno Dan was given the task to look over Airek and make sure that there were plenty of pics of him, so he would never ever blow of his buddies birthdays again.

Airek lead the huge crew that was out to celebrate JC's birthday and started making his way up the pants and skirts of every girl he could find the minute he got in the club, he couldn't hide his love for XXX Jay moved his mouth dangerously close to Jay's ....at one point. Airek was all over the club, he even tried his best to climb Huggie Mccuddles AKA Big Steve. Even JC was shocked by Airek's behavior. Nothing could stop Airek, he kept partying and so was of control he even let the least respected man in porn - KB make out with him. Others that spent time with Airek included Jay Styles, Ron of CC Bill, Big E of Fuck You Cash, Cory of Weg Cash, recovered from his ass kicking and the staff of Body English

Airek tired his best to get his girl Lia 28 to get naked for him, but he failed. He was much luckier with Claudia-Maire and for awhile was lost in her massive boobs. His co-workers from Shane's World and Penny Flame almost got into a wrestling match for his love. Airek was really working the club. At the end of the night he was so of control that he had to be restrained by Anthony AKA Silver Cash Albert and Just Dave.

Porno Dan lost Airek at the end of night, good idea to leave Airek with a guy whose bac is higher than his IQ, and he was finally was put to sleep by Anthony before he could do further harm to society

Damn Waking Up Was Hard

Posted on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 at 1:02 AM - Link

This am! I just couldn't sake that left over Vegas non-sence. I just wanted to thank a couple of people that made my trip out there a blast and especially made my birthday a fucking amazing night. Just Dave (duh) AMA Joe, Albert I mean Anthony, Megan & Carrie (Who drove all the way out just for me, well I'd like to think so) Penny Flame (of fucking course, I mean she is the president of earth and all) Vince Voyeur (who I had a blast with, great hanging with ya) Rucca Page (for making the night after my birthday just as fun, SCORES!) Francis from Iporn (for WHORES @ SCORES) Ummm who else, that one girl who I had to print the retraction for that one time who I ran into there and she looked hot as fucking hell, I wish I could of pulled you hair and made out with you in the hallway before your dinner. One can dream though right? Well my trip was awesome and of course Team Flame fucking killed the XXX Iron Man. Proof you say? Here.
The eye of the tiger